Sudbury Lovebirds Give Their Best Advice
Love – it’s a subject just about everyone has tried to tackle or define at some point in their lives. Something everyone has experienced but is still so fleeting and impossible to pin point. Centuries of prolific thinkers have tried their best to put it into words:
“Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own…” – Robert A. Heinlein
“Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” ― Emily Brontë
“You understand now why they lost their minds and fought the wars, And why I’ve spent my whole life trying to put it into words” – Taylor Swift (even Taylor doesn’t get it!)
And from Shakespeare, one of the most noted authorities on the topic of love “The course of true love never did run smooth”. Which brings us to the topic of relationships, after dodging the pitfalls of first dates, meeting parents, and finally deciding to keep a toothbrush at the other persons place, how do we make it last? The truth is there is no right answer. Every relationship is different and every partner has different needs. In light of the Valentine’s season, we got in touch with some of our favourite Sudbury couples and got their advice on how to maintain a long lasting relationship.
Alex & Kate, 1 year
Alex: “Kate and I have pretty much figured out what we need to do in order for our relationship to run smoothly. We keep things interesting by getting out of the house. We play sports together; go hiking, snowshoeing/snowboarding, whatever we can do to get outside. We plan trips together so we have things to look forward to. We are very supportive of each other, and can talk about anything that is bothering us.”
Kate: “I think there are a lot of ingredients in a recipe for a successful, healthy relationship. Alex and I are active, busy bees and as much as we enjoy a movie night in together we usually opt for getting out of the house. I think it’s easy to fall into a routine of staying in and doing the same things every night, so we’re constantly mixing it up. We play on several mixed sports teams, cook for each other, go to the movies, take road trips and do a lot of outdoor activities. We get along great with each other’s families and friends and know it’s important to spend some days apart. Instead of buying materialistic gifts we’d rather make memories and catch an NHL or NBA game, check out a new city or take a trip together. I believe being stubborn gets you nowhere. It’s important to be open minded, compromise and never hold on to any anger. If you have an issue – talk about it and then get over it, don’t hold things over each other’s heads. It’s not about who has the upper hand or wears the pants, we’re a team and I believe when you can realize that, you’re ahead of the game. At the end of the day, it’s scary being open and honest with your feelings, but I think the chance of not allowing yourself to give your relationship everything you’ve got is even scarier.”
Lachana & Jason, 9 years
Lachana: “Always love, honour and respect each other, do little things for one another to show your love and appreciation. Always make time for each other, whether it is just spending time at home watching a movie together or going out for dinner, one on one time is important to just relax and enjoy each other’s company.
Jason: “Communication is very important, be open and honest with each other. And always be good to each other, don’t sweat the small stuff!”
Jason & David, 18 years
David: “Opposites attract. One is more assertive and the other is more laid-back which helps balance one another.”
Jason: “You must have trust and be able to communicate freely with one another. Remembering these few things led us to where we are today after 18 years.”
Rosanna & Gord, 22 years
Rosanna: “Embrace family, respect each other’s differences, and love like there is no tomorrow!”
Gord: “Do the little things…”
Maybe you’re testing the waters of a new relationship, maybe you’re all you need, maybe you’re fighting to keep that loving feeling alive. No matter what your relationship status is this February take the advice of these fine folks to heart – they must be doing something right! To close us out this St. Valentine’s Day, a quote on the absurdity of love and relationships that we just can’t help ourselves getting into again and again.
“It reminds me of that old joke- you know, a guy walks into a psychiatrist’s office and says, hey doc, my brother’s crazy! He thinks he’s a chicken. Then the doc says, why don’t you turn him in? Then the guy says, I would but I need the eggs. I guess that’s how I feel about relationships. They’re totally crazy, irrational, and absurd, but we keep going through it because we need the eggs.” – Woody Allen
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